I'm feeling very lost.
I can't stand the school I am at; the lack of structure and socializing, not to mention the abysmal ineptitude of the accounting and financial aid departments have killed my drive to go to school. I've been considering another program, but to try and balance school and Monkey Child is getting to me and I can't keep up with it all. I want to quit.
The problem is Bald Man. I've been telling him how I feel and how much I want to stop school until MonkeyChild is in school himself, but he's not listening. I know he's stressed; the impending government shutdown means he may not get a paycheck for awhile (but will still have to work) and we'll have to go back on public assistance for awhile. But damn it, I can't keep up with the kiddo, plus his increasing pain levels which leave me doing everything except driving.
I think it'll be time to take some time away from school, maybe do some writing and finish those unfinished novels I've been working on for years when I get the itch to write; plus I can focus on little man more often, which is something he's needing more and more lately. I'm looking at doing some sort of direct sales like Pampered Chef to bring in some extra money, so maybe taking a break from school would be good. Especially if we continue to try for another baby.
Now, how do I convince Baldman that this is the right thing to do?
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
so failing on the Babycenter challenge
There is a challenge on Babycenter blogs this week about having sex every day for a week. Yeah. Failing that one BIG TIME!
However: I've been using these pee on a stick ovulation predictor sticks because of the PCOS, and it's time to boogie, so maybe we can make it 5 out of 7 days? LOL he gets home late tonight because he's working in at his old shop, but he knows it's boogie night, so we're getting ready! wish us luck and babydust!!
However: I've been using these pee on a stick ovulation predictor sticks because of the PCOS, and it's time to boogie, so maybe we can make it 5 out of 7 days? LOL he gets home late tonight because he's working in at his old shop, but he knows it's boogie night, so we're getting ready! wish us luck and babydust!!
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Needs a mommy break
Not a break from my mom, but we're pretty much on that already except for her comments on Facebook, at least until she gets a new phone that's not attached to a crazy psycho guy who can track her phone calls.
I mean a break from my boy. I love him, I do. and I love that he's getting more into playing with someone rather than parallel play or alone. But sometimes I just need a break to do school work and housework.
I get one Sunday every other week at home alone, and I have to spend that time trying to catch up on schoolwork because the Monkey Child just won't let me study or write; by the time Bald Man comes home I am too tired to study, especially now that I have given up regular caffeine (I still get an occasional Starbucks once in a while). I've been tempted to try getting up early with the Baldman to work on stuff while Monkey Child sleeps some more, but it's so nice and warm and cozy in my bed on these cold days....and Saturdays are spent taking Baldman's cousins out and away from their grandma (the one who said Monkey child would be retarded because he had a flat face) for the day (thankfully for them they will be moving into their new home in about two weeks, but we're still going to get them out of the house...keeps them out of trouble)
I'm thinking of teaching Monkey child a new routine of "studying time", where he gets to sit at his table and color and practice his letters (he's got his letter J down!), while I at least get the reading done from my textbooks to keep up in that regard. He's good about not coloring on anything but paper now, because he knows that if he does he loses crayon privileges for 24 hours.
LOL, I should probably get back to my studying, but I had to vent a little. Just so tired.
I mean a break from my boy. I love him, I do. and I love that he's getting more into playing with someone rather than parallel play or alone. But sometimes I just need a break to do school work and housework.
I get one Sunday every other week at home alone, and I have to spend that time trying to catch up on schoolwork because the Monkey Child just won't let me study or write; by the time Bald Man comes home I am too tired to study, especially now that I have given up regular caffeine (I still get an occasional Starbucks once in a while). I've been tempted to try getting up early with the Baldman to work on stuff while Monkey Child sleeps some more, but it's so nice and warm and cozy in my bed on these cold days....and Saturdays are spent taking Baldman's cousins out and away from their grandma (the one who said Monkey child would be retarded because he had a flat face) for the day (thankfully for them they will be moving into their new home in about two weeks, but we're still going to get them out of the house...keeps them out of trouble)
I'm thinking of teaching Monkey child a new routine of "studying time", where he gets to sit at his table and color and practice his letters (he's got his letter J down!), while I at least get the reading done from my textbooks to keep up in that regard. He's good about not coloring on anything but paper now, because he knows that if he does he loses crayon privileges for 24 hours.
LOL, I should probably get back to my studying, but I had to vent a little. Just so tired.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
New sister in law!
As of Sunday, I have a new sister in law!
No, Baldman's sister is not involved. Although it would be nice if she were replaced. But I digress..
One of my brothers, the 22 year old one, finally got divorced from his first wife while he was on R&R from his tour in Afghanistan. This is a good thing, because she's literally a crackwhore; she got pregnant by another man while he was deployed to Iraq a few years ago. She is pregnant again and cannot pass a drug test. Yes, he was able to win full custody of the son he had with her, and the boy now lives with my mom until Brother gets back from deployment.
He met a girl while deployed and going through the divorce process, and for awhile it was on and off with them, but now that they are free to be together, they got married over in Afghanistan (she is also in the Army, a medic to his mechanic). She seems like a real sweetheart; and I can't wait to meet her in person! She and Brother return stateside in the end of July, and they will be stationed in DC, which means....
Sorry LVA peoples, but I won't be heading to the reunion this summer. If it had been any other time and I knew the exact dates they would be stateside and in Vegas it might be possible, but since they won't know until only a couple weeks before they leave exact dates, I cannot come. Between that and the chance that I might be pregnant and unable to fly....it's just not feasable. Maybe for Christmas, though.
To be honest, though, I don't really want to go to the reunion anyway, when it seems the committees have no details to give us, or even a venue picked!
No, Baldman's sister is not involved. Although it would be nice if she were replaced. But I digress..
One of my brothers, the 22 year old one, finally got divorced from his first wife while he was on R&R from his tour in Afghanistan. This is a good thing, because she's literally a crackwhore; she got pregnant by another man while he was deployed to Iraq a few years ago. She is pregnant again and cannot pass a drug test. Yes, he was able to win full custody of the son he had with her, and the boy now lives with my mom until Brother gets back from deployment.
He met a girl while deployed and going through the divorce process, and for awhile it was on and off with them, but now that they are free to be together, they got married over in Afghanistan (she is also in the Army, a medic to his mechanic). She seems like a real sweetheart; and I can't wait to meet her in person! She and Brother return stateside in the end of July, and they will be stationed in DC, which means....
Sorry LVA peoples, but I won't be heading to the reunion this summer. If it had been any other time and I knew the exact dates they would be stateside and in Vegas it might be possible, but since they won't know until only a couple weeks before they leave exact dates, I cannot come. Between that and the chance that I might be pregnant and unable to fly....it's just not feasable. Maybe for Christmas, though.
To be honest, though, I don't really want to go to the reunion anyway, when it seems the committees have no details to give us, or even a venue picked!
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Not this month....
No luck this month, but this works out well. If one believes in that Chinese Birth Chart, and after comparing it to all of my friends who had babies when I did I think it's seriously creepy how accurate it is, we would have conceived a boy this time. February is for a girl, and then boy for March and three months of girls. So I'm hoping for a lucky February!
In other news I signed up for the Jeopardy online test. In grad school I was hit with the not so flattering moniker of "google" because I could pull up facts out of my head faster than a search engine, which drove both professors and classmates nuts. I learned the hard way to keep my mouth shut no matter what, since no one likes being told, by someone either younger than them or supposedly less educated than them, information that they may have gotten wrong. But damn it, I might as well put the great education I got in high school (All those facts from Krausie's class come in handy a lot on that show!) to use....
We took BaldMan's cousins and little man out walking on Lake Champlain last weekend and he got a big kick out of it. Can you tell it was cold? The lake was frozen nearly completely across, except in the very middle where the current is fast. I've been telling Baldman for years I wouldn't walk on the ice, because I was afraid of falling through, but somehow he and the girls convinced me to go out so I could take pictures. If you can't tell, little man loved it.
In other news I signed up for the Jeopardy online test. In grad school I was hit with the not so flattering moniker of "google" because I could pull up facts out of my head faster than a search engine, which drove both professors and classmates nuts. I learned the hard way to keep my mouth shut no matter what, since no one likes being told, by someone either younger than them or supposedly less educated than them, information that they may have gotten wrong. But damn it, I might as well put the great education I got in high school (All those facts from Krausie's class come in handy a lot on that show!) to use....
We took BaldMan's cousins and little man out walking on Lake Champlain last weekend and he got a big kick out of it. Can you tell it was cold? The lake was frozen nearly completely across, except in the very middle where the current is fast. I've been telling Baldman for years I wouldn't walk on the ice, because I was afraid of falling through, but somehow he and the girls convinced me to go out so I could take pictures. If you can't tell, little man loved it.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
No visit from Aunt Flo
So I don't know if it's the PCOS rearing its ugly head, or something else, but I haven't had any bleeding except a day of spotting since going off the Pill. Unless that was it, I don't know what's up. I was on antibiotics just before the pill ended, so who knows what's up. If I am already pregnant, it's creepy. I got pregnant with Monkey Child RIGHT after I got off the pill last time, but I had a period first!
Guess I have stuff to pick up on Payday.
Guess I have stuff to pick up on Payday.
Monday, January 10, 2011
I need nookie
After reading Betsy Shaw's Blog on BabyCenter about the six stages of sex after kids, I've come to the realization that I NEED NOOKIE. I need it NOW.
I guess if you use the scale Betsy has up, we're in stage 3-4, the so tired stage where we just can't. It's not that I don't WANT to, but there are some days that Monkey Child is just bouncing off the walls with energy that once he's down for the count so am I. And then on the days I want to, Baldman is having a bad pain day or is just too tired from the changes going on at work (they're moving his offices) that he's no good to me.
This stage is no good for the baby making plans. I swear, sometimes I wonder if we should just schedule sex, like a date night (whatever that is...). But damn it, I miss sex. We used to be all over each other, and even right after Monkeychild was born we couldn't keep our hands to ourselves (let's just say we didn't wait the six weeks...) Then I went on the Pill and my drive disappeared. But now....now that I'm off the Pill my drive is back, so now we need to get the DH back up to par. I'm hoping this sleep study he's got to do tonight down in Albany will help him somehow. Maybe if he gets more restful sleep at night he could be more like how we were before kiddo came along!!
I guess if you use the scale Betsy has up, we're in stage 3-4, the so tired stage where we just can't. It's not that I don't WANT to, but there are some days that Monkey Child is just bouncing off the walls with energy that once he's down for the count so am I. And then on the days I want to, Baldman is having a bad pain day or is just too tired from the changes going on at work (they're moving his offices) that he's no good to me.
This stage is no good for the baby making plans. I swear, sometimes I wonder if we should just schedule sex, like a date night (whatever that is...). But damn it, I miss sex. We used to be all over each other, and even right after Monkeychild was born we couldn't keep our hands to ourselves (let's just say we didn't wait the six weeks...) Then I went on the Pill and my drive disappeared. But now....now that I'm off the Pill my drive is back, so now we need to get the DH back up to par. I'm hoping this sleep study he's got to do tonight down in Albany will help him somehow. Maybe if he gets more restful sleep at night he could be more like how we were before kiddo came along!!
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